Secrets Worth Keeping (Finding my Home Book 2) Page 5

  “Have fun, remember we are just upstairs if you need us, ok?” He says his tone serious.

  “Ok” I reply, watching him disappear back upstairs then turning to face Kat and Jenny.

  “Ok” Jenny claps, “I figured we would just watch something like friends first so we can write a list of things we want to get and not be distracted by the movie, sound good?”

  “Sounds good” Kat replies as I just nod.

  “What sorts of things do you need to get?” Kat asks me as we settle down on the sofa, each of us grabbing a blanket and pulling it over us as Jenny hands out coffees and Kat hands out her cookies.

  “I know it’s the morning but it is the holidays and you went through hell yesterday so I’ve made the coffees Irish” Jenny grins as I gape at her, not expecting that in the slightest. I take a sip not really knowing what an Irish coffee is, just knowing that it’s got some sort of alcohol in it.

  Oh Wow, this might just become my new favourite drink.

  Jenny puts friends on the background, and I put my cookie in my mouth so I can reach out and grab a notebook and pen from the coffee table, Jenny really did think of everything.

  “I need more pyjamas, tops, jeans and jumpers but Riot also mentioned something about snow stuff and to be honest I haven’t got any idea what I need for the trip” I shrug.

  “Right ok, well these are the websites I use for the clothes and this one is brilliant for snow stuff,” Jenny says as she writes down a list of websites and hands it to me.

  “As for what you’ll need snow wise, I’d suggest a full snow suit and snow boots, it gets bloody cold up there. Thermal leggings and long sleeved tops for underneath” Kat starts, “do you have a hat, scarf and gloves?”

  “Nope” I say as I continue to eat my cookie, writing down everything she suggests.

  “In that case you’ll need those too but I’d double up on gloves if I were you, especially if you’re not used to the cold” she grins. “I also have a perfect site for snow boots, on the more expensive side but they are beautiful and well worth the money” she adds.

  “Sounds good to me, let’s get started” I say grinning, excitedly.

  Chapter Five

  We spend a good part of the morning shopping and talking. It’s honestly really nice to have some girl time, it feels really relaxed and chilled out. There’s no expectations or awkwardness and actually even with Rylie it doesn’t feel this chilled, I just hadn’t noticed before since I didn't have anything else to compare it to. Now that I think of it, Rylie hasn’t messaged me at all and I sent her a text earlier whilst I was getting dressed, letting her know what happened with Jeremy. I know it was Winter formal last night but it’s gone lunch time now and she still hasn’t replied. It’s probably nothing but I know that if she had gone through what I had last night, I probably would have turned up at her house and not let her out of my sight until I knew for certain she was going to be ok. I know I have the guys and honestly if I didn’t have them last night, I would’ve been an absolute mess but regardless it still would’ve been nice to hear from her.

  I hope she’s ok. Hopefully she’s just gotten caught up with Darcy and her phone’s died or something, so she hasn’t got my messages. She probably thinks that I’m having sexy times with my guys.

  I fucking wish.

  “Are you girls hungry?” Jenny asks as she stands up.

  “Sure but since we are pigging out all day and are having takeout tonight, do you want to have something a bit lighter for lunch?” Kat asks.

  Honestly I am feeling super stuffed from all my snacking anyway so lighter lunch sounds awesome. That way I’ll have more room for pizza later.

  “That works for me” I agree turning towards Jenny.

  “I’m pretty sure I have the stuff to make Caesar salads?” She asks.

  “I’ve never had one but there’s not much I won’t try” I laugh. “What about the guys?”

  “They can fend for themselves, they’re more than capable enough to make themselves sandwhiches” Jenny giggles.

  “Fair enough” I grin.

  “Get the wine Jen, we’ve already had Irish coffee we may as well” Kat yells after her before turning to wink at me grinning.

  I love hanging out with these women.

  It doesn’t take Jenny long to rustle up the salads, she hands me mine and a glass of rose wine, yum. I’m not normally a wine drinker, preferring whiskey or tequila but I’m still going to drink it. I’m actually pleasantly surprised by the salad, it tastes really good and is surprisingly filling. To be honest, I did practically drown mine in salad dressing since it tasted so good though.

  “Oh I just thought” Kat suddenly exclaims, “did the boys tell you about the Christmas eve party we throw every year?”

  “Nope, they said something about it being Trick’s turn this year for everyone to come over and decorate the tree?” I ask, hoping I got that right, my brain is feeling a bit fried still from all the shit that went down yesterday.

  “Yes we do that too, we’ll do that in the morning on Christmas eve, everyone will come here and we’ll have eggnog and Christmas music and then we’ll get ready and go to Kat’s for the Christmas eve party. It’s basically just an excuse to get dressed up, drink and dance” Jenny giggles.

  “That’s pretty awesome, what kind of dressed up are we talking about though?” I ask, mentally flipping through what I’ve bought over the past few days only to realise that the majority of it is either underwear or lounge wear. Nothing suitable for party.

  “That’s what I was getting at, Tesoro” Kat smiles, “we tend to go all out, the men in suits and the women in dresses.”

  “Oh, ok. I need a dress then, what sort?”

  “That’s the beauty of it only being family, you can wear whatever the hell you want” Jenny grins. "I went in a ballgown last year."

  I chuckle and pull the laptop closer to start searching. Cheesy as it may be I want to at least get a red dress since it’s Christmas. It’ll be a bit of a change from my usually dark attire, even my coat is a dark red. This is the first time I’ve celebrated Christmas since I left and I’m going to go all out. I’m not sure my guys are going to know what hit them.

  “Oh crap I need wrapping paper and stuff” I suddenly remember.

  “I know the perfect site for that, here” Kat says holding out her hands for the laptop.

  I hand it over to her and watch as she quickly types in an address before handing it back. My eyes widen at the choices, all the pretty paper. I spend far too long and buy way too much but it’s just so pretty I can’t help it.

  “Oh my god, bows!” I say suddenly making the two women jump, they start giggling and I join them. That is probably one of the most girly things I have ever said and I’m not even ashamed.

  “I’m glad it’s not just me that likes the bows” Jenny chuckles.

  “I’ve never wrapped presents before, so I don’t think the guys are going to know what hit them” I chuckle and ignore the look that they share.

  We all go back to shopping and I checkout quickly, immensely happy that the site offers next day delivery.

  I know what I’m doing tomorrow.

  Looking through the website Jenny showed me earlier for dresses, I decide to go fairly simple. I absolutely do not want to wear heels my feet are pretty badly cut up from running on the gravel and the foot that Jeremy used to pull me across the gravel to the car is bruised. So heels are just not happening. I’m going to wear my Docs, I said I would if I went to another dance anyway. I did buy some trainers and ballet flats earlier as well as a gorgeous pair of knee high boots but I think I can make my Docs work really well.

  My focus then changes from, just finding a super pretty dress, to finding a dress that will look good with my boots. I skim through the site until I find a simple body hugging blood red dress, that will hit about mid thigh. It’s a simple design with a sweetheart neckline that shows a bit of cleavage but not too much and thin straps on the shoulder
s, I think it should work well with my boots. It’s freaking freezing though so I’m going to need a jacket. I search through the area of the website that has all the jackets before an idea strikes me and I end up buying a leather jacket to go over the top, slightly oversized, it’s more fashion than practicality and wouldn’t be any good for when I ride my bike, which is fine since my actual bike jacket is really good quality.

  I add a lipstick that should match my dress and, on a whim, add some straighteners too. This store does next day shipping as well and I’m sort of excited, I’m not even going to tell the guys I got a dress, I like surprising them. I take another sip of wine enjoying the flavour, normal wine tastes really acidic to me, I guess I’ve just been drinking the wrong kinds. I glance over at Jenny and Kat to see if they’re done with their shopping yet and see that they’ve both nearly finished their second glasses. I vaguely remember one of the guys saying something about how they get when they’ve been drinking wine but so much has happened since then I can’t really remember what the warning was, just that it was a warning to not be around them when they drink it.

  They share a look and then turn to me, uh oh. I don’t know why uh oh but uh oh is the first thing that comes to mind. I take a sip of wine to distract myself and immediately choke on it with the next words that come out of Jenny’s mouth.

  “So you’re dating both of our sons and their friends?” she ask casually.

  I damn near have a fucking heart attack.

  “I, erm it’s not like that” I try to stutter out. This is my nightmare situation right now, what if this is when they tell me to stay away from their sons, or worse tell me to leave?

  “Don’t panic, I had a polyamorous relationship in high school” Kat says grinning and everything pauses for a second before a thousand questions fly through my mind, my eyes dart to Jenny.

  “I was her biggest supporter” she tells me, grinning.

  That explains why her and Rob were so ok with the idea of all the guys taking me to the Winter Formal.

  “Actually, Marc and Jensen’s dad Rich were two of the guys I was in a relationship with.”

  Jensen’s dad, holy fuck.

  Before I can question her, which probably wouldn’t have been appropriate, although to be honest I think the whole idea of appropriate has gone out the window right now, she carries on telling her story and I’m far to curious to interrupt her and risk her stopping.

  “There were five of us, me and the four guys, the other two were never really as invested as Rich, Marc and I were. Eventually one of them left for college and another one just didn’t want to do it anymore. It was hard. I’m not sure what happened but we were teenagers and as soon as they left, it sort of fizzled between Rich and us too. Marc tried desperately to keep us all together seeing how much it hurt me but it just wasn’t in the cards. Losing Rich hurt far more than losing the other two. He moved on and found Jensen’s mom who you probably can’t remember but was such and amazing woman and became one of my best friends. I was happy for him. Marc was too but we still missed him. Still do actually” she smiles sadly as she remembers and suddenly other things that Marc and her or even Rich have done make sense. My heart aches for her, it would be torture to lose one of my guys and watch him be with someone else even if she was an amazing person.

  I don’t know what’s in store for me and the guys, there’s a chance that when I talk to them at the end of the trip, they can’t handle it and we end, them never wanting to see me again.

  Pain pierces through me, the force of it making me gasp, yeah I am not going to survive that.

  Before that happens and I’m no longer around, I want to make sure that Kat gets her happy ever after with Marc and Rich.

  “Oh, whoops, I think I’ve had too much wine” Kat giggles but the sound is sad, “watching how you are with the boys just reminds me so much of Rich and Marc, I guess.”

  “Does Marc miss Rich as much as you?” I ask hoping I’m not over stepping, “I thought he looked sad when Cash mentioned them all taking me to the dance but I was a bit too busy freaking out that he’d just outright told you like it was no big deal” I giggle and they both join in.

  “Yes he does but it’s been years and so much has happened to Rich” Kat explains, obviously referring to how his wife and child were killed.

  “He kept shooting looks at you two yesterday” I say determined.

  “Really?” she asks as hope sparks in her eyes.

  “Yes, I think you should text Marc and tell him what I noticed and then invite him and Rich over for pizza soon. You’re right it has been a long time and so much has happened in both your lives, but I don’t think his feelings have changed. Maybe he just needs a nudge in the right direction?” I suggest.

  “It might be the wine talking, but I agree with Ever, Kat. I’ve caught him watching you, his feelings haven’t changed but you are married now and although Marc was fine with it when you guys were teenagers he probably thinks that there’s no way Marc would be ok with it now. Do what Ever said and tell Marc to make it obvious he has no problem with it. Honestly what harm is it going to cause just to test the waters?” Jenny asks, her focus on her friend. “At worst nothing comes of it but at best you’ve got Rich back.”

  Kat just sits and thinks for a minute and I really, really, hope she takes the leap and tries, Jenny created a pretty damn compelling argument.

  “Ok, I guess there’s no harm in trying. I’m going to need more liquid courage though" she grins nervously, as she holds her glass up in one hand as she types out a message on her phone with the other one. Jenny giggles and fills in back up. “Marc says he’s in and he’ll call Rich and ask him to come.” She giggles.

  “So back to you and the boys?” Kat asks, taking the focus off of her.

  She’s just been incredibly honest with me and it would be amazing if I had someone to talk to about this. Someone who has experience with what I’m dealing with and who I trust.

  “We aren’t in a relationship like you guys were. I actually don’t really know what’s going on. I need to talk to them because of how I feel about all of them. Can I ask you a question?” I ask nervously taking a huge gulp of wine. Jenny smiles softly letting Kat take the lead, no judgement on her face at all.

  “Of course, Tesoro. I’ll try to help as best I can” Kat smiles softly.

  “How did it work, I haven’t even entertained the thought of being with all of them and they probably don’t want that, but I am curious?”

  “I think you’ll be surprised how they feel Sweet” Jenny interrupts a knowing glint in her eyes.

  “I can’t let myself hope” I admit barely above a whisper, dropping my head as I admit it out loud.

  The couch bounces either side of me and I lift my head just as two sets of arms wrap around me and squish me in a mom cuddle. Kat pulls my head so it lands onto her shoulder. Offering me comfort.

  “It’ll all be ok Tesoro, I’ve been there. When it’s right it just works. With me, Marc and Rich it was seamless we worked together really well. There was no jealousy or anything like that, with the other two it wasn’t so smooth they’d get jealous and demand more time or that sort of thing, it just didn’t work” Kat tells me softly as Jenny squeezes her arm around me. “I’m not saying it’s all smooth sailing, it’s a relationship, it takes time and effort to truly make it work” Kat finishes.

  “Don’t mind me. I’m not intruding on your girly stuff just getting a drink” Jensen yells loudly before walking past the sitting room, chuckling to himself.

  I lift my head off of Kat’s shoulder just in time to see, Jensen panic.

  “Fuck, is she crying?” He practically yells, panicking as he rushes towards me, Kat chuckles quietly next me which turns into a gasp as we watch Jensen trip over nothing AGAIN, stumbling forward and cursing up a storm before he hits the back of the couch, does this weird flip thing over the back of it bouncing on the seat where Jenny and Kat were just sat and then lands on the floor between the couch
and the coffee table with a loud bang and a groan.

  I jump up immediately rushing over to him and trying to stop my laughter, hearing Kat and Jenny already in absolute fits of giggles behind me is not helping me control my own.

  “Are you ok Jensen?” I chuckle.

  “Fuck” he grumbles before his eyes shoot wide and search for me. “You’re not crying?”

  “Nope, I never was, you freaked out for no reason” I giggle as he grimaces, the sound of loud footsteps momentarily distracts me and gives Jensen the opportunity to tug me down on top of him, somehow managing to do it with out hurting any of scrapes.

  “I missed you” he says quietly, before kissing me gently. I sigh happily.

  Spending the day with Jenny and Kat has been really amazing and surprisingly informative. I can’t wait to see how it all plays out when we get pizza soon and Marc and Rich show up. I should probably mention something to the guys before they get here or they’re going to be super confused. To be fair though it would be quite amusing. Despite all that, I have really missed Jensen and the others.

  “I missed you too you dork” I say lowering my lips to his and then biting down before soothing the sting.

  “Naughty Angel, Kat and Jenny are sat right there” Jensen grins.

  I glance over my shoulder and chuckle at them still laughing their asses off at Jensen’s expense.

  I’m about to reply when there’s suddenly a cacophony of footsteps rushing into the room.

  “Ever?” Trick asks tightly, I can just picture him scanning the room for me and not finding me. “Where is she?” he asks his voice tense and obviously trying to remain polite.

  “We heard banging momma, is Everleigh ok?” Cash says his voice only barely managing to stay a fraction politer than Trick was. I can hear the other guys shuffling restlessly and stifle a giggle when Jensen smirks and tells me to be quiet.